Stupid Favorite Fairy Tale Ships

Annd, here it is! My list of my very favorite stupidest fairy tale ships. Along with a couple ones that I hate, just because. I feel like I’ve been needing to write this post for a while now, anyway. I love! Talking about this! I love it much more than you love listening to me! But I will never shut up. Ever.

  • Ivan and the Princess Blue-Eyes

I have not been able to find a copy of this fairy tale anywhere except here, but oh boy is it amazing. “Don’t take my armour off, dear princess, don’t pierce my white flesh with your sword!” he pleads. “Kiss me on the lips instead.” –an actual quote

Yeah, so she was just about to kill him and I’m pretty sure she blinded someone–no, wait, she blinded his dad, but we don’t care about that because his dad is a jerk. HUSH SHE’S PERFECT. She’s very bloodthirsty, but very perfect. It’s an enemies-to-lovers relationship, which is my absolute favourite trope when done right and my absolute most hated trope when done wrong (and it’s SO HARD to find it done right). Does this one deliver for me? Yes it does.

  • The prince and princess from ‘The Prince and the Three Fates’

Ahh an actual healthy relationship on this list what is this

Anyway, the prince is prophesied to die from either a snake, a crocodile, or a dog. The princess hears that and decides she is having none of it, so she decides she will save her husband no matter what. And I’m still waiting on a retelling, Disney. Maybe you could get to work on that rather than remaking all your old stuff for the umpteenth time. Just saying.

It’s an Egyptian fairy tale, too (ancient Egyptian, actually, though I’m fairly sure the ending was added by Andrew Lang). I’m not necessarily against all the live-action remakes, but it does get to me that Disney could be using their time to spotlight lesser known fairy tales, especially non-European ones that have a harder time getting exposure over here, and they’re not. But oh well.

I need to post about this fairy tale. Good heavens.

  • Gareth and Lynet


Also, is it really a surprise to anyone that I’m talking about Arthuriana again? No. No it is not.

So, Gareth (who is Gawain’s brother) sneaks into Camelot as a kitchen boy for…some reason. Lynet asks the knights to save her sister from a man besieging her castle, but refuses to tell them her name for…some reason. No one decides to help her except our boy Gareth because plot convenience. They argue a lot, and Lynet can be pretty dang classist, but it’s the time period it is and she has a learning curve, so I forgive her. And frankly, she’s depending on a kitchen boy who (for all she knows) has no idea how to fight, and her sister is in danger. I don’t really blame her for reacting badly.

Oh, and also? She’s a enchantress. Although I’m still confused why, if she has magic, she can’t just save her sister herself? Oh well! Plot convenience!

But it was not to be. He ended up with Lyonesse, the sister, instead. And I kind of love Lyonesse, too, but just. WHY WAS IT NOT CANOOONN

(and yeah there’s no Arthurian ‘canon’ really, but my point is it didn’t happen in any medieval stories that I know of.)

  • The couple from ‘My Candlestick’

Another fairy tale I haven’t been able to find anywhere except here! The fairy tale is adorable though. And a little bit sad, but still adorable. The heroine actually reminds me a bit of my own first heroine: cute, a bit of a pathological liar, and sarcastic and fun. And honestly, I haven’t run into a lot of characters like these. We need more. And then there’s the prince; he’s enchanted and he never talks to her directly, but he starts opening up to her more and more and it’s so CUTE, dang it.

  • Mordred and Guinevere–oh look, my Arthurian crack ship

Ahem. Um. So, before you go, ‘Um, she is his father’s (uncle’s?) WIFE? What is wrong with you?’ (Totally acceptable reaction tbh.) Let me just say…It was a thing. Talk to Geoffrey of Monmouth about it.

But I just feel like I’d LOVE SEEING THIS ONSCREEN. Or on page. Whatever. I have a thing for (fictional!) unhealthy relationships, and there is lots of DrAmA potential in unhealthy relationships, and we all know I love stupid drama. These two are pretty much the usurping king and queen of unhealthy relationships and stupid drama. I apologize for nothing.

At first I thought my love for this simply stemmed from my dinosaur brain going, ‘VILLAINOUS GUINEVERE. OH MY GOSH SHE’S TAKING OVER THE THRONE. GO AND SMASH THAT PATRIARCHY, GIRL’. And yeah, that’s a valid reason for why I like it, but also. Drama.

I blame this whole ship on my dinosaur brain.

And it says something about Arthurian legend that I don’t think they’re the unhealthiest relationship in the legends. Especially not if you expand ‘relationship’ to mean romantic and platonic relationships. But I can think of a few unhealthier romantic ones, too.

  • Prunella and Bensiabel, from ‘Prunella’

Another one that’s weird, but still my fave. It’s basically Rapunzel and the prince, except the prince is the witch’s son instead, because all the best twists to a fairy tale have already been thought of. And he does pressure her into kissing him (by which I mean he TAKES ADVANTAGE OF LIFE-THREATENING SITUATIONS), but he always backs off when she tells him no each time, which…helps. I wouldn’t be able to stand this otherwise. But! He helps save her every time his mom tries to kill her (which happens a lot, incidentally), and Prunella doesn’t consider herself obligated to fall head-over-heels for him just because he saved her a couple times. It’s only after they’ve known each other for a while that she considers him at all, and in a world of love at first sight, that’s kind of refreshing.

They’re amazing. Specifically, Pru is amazing. Read the fairy tale, I’m serious.


And I feel like this list wouldn’t be complete without mentioning a few ships I want to boot to the curb.

  • King Thrushbeard and the princess, from ‘King Thrushbeard’

Thinking about King Thrushbeard still makes me rage to this day, to be honest. The princess insults King Thrushbeard once when he asks her father for her hand in marriage, so then he does all this weird stuff where he disguises himself as a peasant and marries her, and then proceeds to humiliate her, emotionally abuse her, and treat her terribly. But it’s okay, because he’s the ‘hero’.

The scars I carry from reading this are still here.

  • Cliges and Fenice

Uh. Another lesser-known couple from Arthuriana! And I don’t exactly regret reading this story, because Alexander is truly amazing and I love his friendship with Guinevere, but I do regret Cliges existing.

I may have gotten along with him better before that whole thing with him cutting off the squire’s leg. Hmm.

He’s also another character in Arthurian legend who falls in love with his aunt-in-law! Hmm.

(In case you’re wondering, yes. This was one of the unhealthier relationships in Arthuriana I had in mind. I’d also like to add Tristram and Iseult to the list? Yet another where the hero gets together with his aunt-in-law! Why is that a thing! )

  • Griselda and whoever-his-name-was-wipe-him-from-my-memory, from ‘Griselda’

I can’t even talk about this fairy tale because it makes me so angry. I’m serious, if you want to know what it’s about, look it up yourself.

But WHY DID NO ONE SHOVE THAT HERO OFF A CLIFF. If no one else wants to, I volunteer. Ahem. I don’t usually get passionate enough about bad characters to hope they die, but there are always exceptions. And this man? Was an exception.

Anyway, that was all my very rambly and very stupid thoughts on my favorite ships! There are a few more I could probably think of, for both the ones I love and the ones I hate, but I don’t want this getting any longer than it is. Are there any you’d add or remove from either list? I’m honestly really curious.

25 thoughts on “Stupid Favorite Fairy Tale Ships

  1. Okay But that Ivan and the Princess Blue-Eyes is one I hadn’t heard of and now I’m obsessed with the quote and the concept

    also I too get really ramped up about healthy vs unhealthy relationships in stories and their portrayal and just asdfjkl


    and I need someone to do an actual good Princess and the Goblin screen adaption, like, please.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I know I love it too

      Yes! Unhealthy relationships are the most fascinating things when done right (but it’s so hard to find it done right)(eek what if I’m not doing it right oh no) They’re something I really love writing.

      YES THEY DO. COME ON DISNEY. *glares*

      Ooh, I clearly need to read that. It’s by George Macdonald, isn’t it?


      • just like yes

        what kills me is how often unhealthy relationships are portrayed as the norm, as the… almost as the ideal. When they’re done right with all the complexity… man. *whistles*


        I believe so ❤

        Liked by 1 person

        • Oh yes, that can be horrifically painful and it happens SO OFTEN. But honestly, my thoughts on what makes a fictional unhealthy relationship awful and what makes one amazing are…really confused. Maybe I should just organize my thoughts and write a blog post. But I think a big part of it is how removed it is from real life, for me? Like I got along with Edward from Twilight because I felt there was no way I’d run into a guy like that. While Jacob…Ahem. I feel like I’ve met a couple guys like that before. But I just don’t know?

          Okay, I have a lot of thoughts on this, apparently, maybe a blog post IS in order.



          • see, now that you’re talking about your thoughts, i’m realizing i have a lot of thoughts too and asdfjkl I guess because relational stuff is so, so complex
            but i would so love to read a post with your thoughts

            and just YES DISNEY PUT US IN CHARGE

            Liked by 1 person

          • I mean
            If you have a lot of thoughts too, I’d love to see a blog post by you too, tbh. I shall clearly have to get my many thoughts in order and crank out a post.

            I KNOW WE’D DO IT SO MUCH BETTER (says the teenager with zero script-writing/general movie-making skills) But seriously, I’d love to see some actual new retellings come out of Disney, but it doesn’t look like we’ll get that for a while. I’d personally love to see them do Gawain and the Green Knight with a very confused and concerned Guingalet (the horse)
            And Eros and Psyche
            And a lot of things that they will never do


          • maybe we could both do posts, because I bet we’d focus on different things and bring forth different perspectives and all the many thoughts and

            YES (also zero experience)! I’ve talked for years about wanting a very loose Sir George and the Dragon retelling, where the knight is awkward and doesn’t understand why people keep breaking out into song around him or why the king can’t just send a whole army to defeat the dragon or why magic and mischief keep happening, and he’s maybe all flustered and uptight, but the princess is like a loudmouthed snarky chick with a penchant for rapping, and the dragon casually dropping references to other fairytales

            ahem. as you can see, i’ve put quite a bit of thought into this. :p

            a confused horse in Gawain and the Green Knight would make my day

            whole film, from Guingalet’s POV

            Liked by 1 person

          • We would…Maybe we should.

            I WOULD LIVE FOR AWKWARD ST GEORGE (Also, completely off topic, but why does St George have this whole dragon story when he was like a Syrian soldier/martyr during the Roman Empire? Did he ever have anything to do with dragons–actually, nvm, let me go look that up)

            Yes that would be perfect
            I mean, Maximus was already pretty much the star of Rapunzel XD I love Rapunzel and Flynn but let’s all admit that Max sort of stole the show.


          • There’re actually quite a few saints that have dragon-slaying as part of their story, but I don’t think St George actually does in our church denomination (Orthodox)? From everything I remember? I could be wrong though, and I’m sure people have local legends

            My favorite dragon saint story is St Symeon the Stylite, where a dragon came up to him so he could heal the dragon’s eye.
            St Symeon was kind of the ASPCA of the ancient world, from everything I remember


          • Ahhh, see, I’m Baptist, we don’t have saints (except for jokingly the chick fil a founder 😉) but that’s really interesting! I wonder how St George and the dragon cake about and got spread…..

            That story is so great, I need a St Symeon movie now

            You’re like the queen of fairy tales and legends. You know that?😉

            Liked by 1 person

          • Ohh, that’s interesting. So Baptists don’t call some of the bible characters saints? I guess they don’t, now that I think about it. (I have Baptist family members I should know these things but apparently I don’t)

            ACK THANK YOU I mean I don’t read fairy tales nearly as often as I should but then I guess who does
            I should probably read more fairy tales 😂


          • Not really, maybe some do, but not most of us, as far as I know.

            Really who does though

            There’s one I want to recommend to you but I can’t remember the name of it… only that it’s kind of a more recent but still older book… I’ll brb let me look it up

            The Ordinary Princess, I think is what it’s called


          • I know there’s just so much to read

            I feel like I’ve heard of that book somewhere but I don’t know where
            And I don’t recognize the cover or plot summary
            And this leaves me with a bizarre feeling of deja vu

            Is it by M. M. Kaye? That’s the book that came up when I googled it.


  2. Jumping in to second Weez’s recommendations of The Ordinary Princess by M.M. Kaye (MAH FAVORITE FAIRY TALE EVER!) and The Princess and the Goblin by George MacDonald (and anything else by George MacDonald… I just finished The Lost Princess/or The Wise Woman a double tale (yes, that’s the title of ONE story… I was confused for a while) and The Light Princess is my ABSOLUTE favorite book of his ever ever ever… though Day Boy and Night Girl might be a close second. Or Princess and the Goblin. I don’t KNOOOOOW they’re all good.

    I’m a weirdo, apparently, because most of the time in stories I don’t really have much interest in the romance angles/relationships. I mean… I ship Janeway/Chakotay from Star Trek Voyager. And O’Neill and Samantha from Stargate. So clearly I’m not immune. But whenever anyone starts asking about my favorite “ships” or “best romance” stories… my mind goes blank. I’m like… um… I know romance is a part of many books I’ve read… but I can’t think of …. I mean… Faramir/Eowyn. I like them. And…. that’s it. LOL

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh, I love George Macdonald too. Photogen and Nycteris is my FAVORITE. But somehow I’ve just…never gotten around to reading The Princess and the Goblin. I don’t know why? And I clearly need to read The Ordinary Princess.

      Hey, that’s perfectly valid! I think platonic relationships can be just as interesting as romantic ones, and I don’t mind a story without any romantic elements between the main characters. And I LOVE Faramir/Eowyn too.


  3. I’m nottt surprised that I haven’t heard of any. Of these but great post!! Anything related to ships is good by my definition! 😂 And omggg the last one gO dIe iN a hOooOOlE!!!!! Anyways, awesome as usual! 💙

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Pingback: The Mystery Blogger Award | Moth of the Day

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